Things you do every day can affect the quality of your relationship with your partner. These habits can have a profound and positive effect on your relationship. Start by practicing good habits until they become second nature to you. A habit takes 21 days to form. Our experienced team provides couples therapy in San Diego to help you develop habits that build a strong relationship. Let’s explore 12 everyday habits for a lasting relationship.
#1 Do Not Avoid Conflict
Every couple has to deal with conflict at some point. Many couples believe that healthy couples do not argue. Rather than avoiding conflicts, however, learn how to handle disagreements properly.
It’s essential to figure out the root of the conflict so you both can make positive and productive progress. Conflict should never involve name-calling, blaming, or physical violence. Instead, identify your own needs and share them with your partner.
Healthy conflict can help people understand each other better. It can also help your partner understand your beliefs, values, and boundaries. Tell your partner if you need more space, or help with the dishes or the kids.
The strength of your relationship depends on how well you handle conflicts. Get into the habit of dealing with conflicts as soon as they arise.
#2 Remain Open to Change
Couples in a long-term relationship understand that people change. As a relationship develops, it undergoes several stages. Over time, you may experience relationship problems such as health issues, personal differences, and financial difficulties.
In a healthy relationship, a person should have the freedom to grow, change, and evolve. Do not stop your partner from changing because you will unknowingly push them away.
By giving your partner more freedom, you will evolve in ways that complement each other. Remember that you started your journey together at the same point in your lives. So, embrace change and remain open to the adventures ahead of you.
#3 Handle Disagreements Respectfully
A healthy relationship depends on how you handle disagreements. Problems arise when you try to win every argument. In relationships, winning means reaching a consensus together.
Avoid jumping to conclusions about your partner’s feelings or thoughts during an argument. Rather than making generalizations, focus on the reason for the fight. Talk to your partner without judgment to find a compromise that you can both accept.
#4 Turn off All Electronics
Take a break from technology and make time for each other. Talk to your partner to set aside time to spend on electronics. Depending on your schedules and obligations, every couple will have a different limit.
With the television constantly on, you cannot build a meaningful relationship. Turn off the television to spend quality time with your partner. Occasionally, you can watch a movie together, but take the time to find out about your partner’s day.
By doing so, you create a bond and lasting memories. Pour your favorite drink and get comfortable on the couch with your partner. Share your thoughts about one another and what you can do to strengthen your relationship.
Focus on building your relationship and talking about any issues you need to address. Make plans together for your next vacation or save a date for a romantic evening. If you need a professional to talk to or couples therapy in San Diego, we can help.
#5 Be Kind to Each Other
Most people appreciate small gestures. Bring your partner breakfast in bed to show your love and affection for them. Make a habit of eating breakfast together and starting the day with each other’s company.
Couples who have been together for a long time regularly express how much their union means to them. Perhaps something you saw made you think of them or recall a shared experience that made you smile.
Be more spontaneous and send your partner loving texts or surprise them by picking up dinner from their favorite restaurant. A simple text or kind gesture can brighten up your partner’s day.
#6 Give Each Other Compliments
Expressing negative or hurtful comments can leave couples feeling like they’re drifting apart. Negative behavior leads to mistrust and a lack of respect. Therefore, practice saying positive things more often.
Compliments will leave your partner feeling appreciated. Giving them compliments will create mutual admiration, affection, and love. Make a habit of complimenting your partner every day.
What Types of Compliments Should You Make?
Compliments based on values show respect for your partner. Appreciate your partner for their strengths and the value they add to your life. Think about something positive you can say about their optimism and kindness.
It is essential to let your partner know that you believe in them. Talk about the future together, even if your partner’s dreams differ from yours. Share enthusiasm for your partner’s desires and long-term goals.
Finally, openly tell your partner you find them attractive. Compliment their physical features and let them know how much you enjoy their company. Tell your partner that you love them if you want to say something more meaningful.
#7 Say the Three Magic Words
To build a strong and meaningful relationship, you have to say, “I love you.” Tell your partner that you love them in the morning and at bedtime. Make your words feel special by kissing your partner.
As a variation, try saying loving words such as “I adore you,” and slip them into conversation whenever you can. Speak these words sincerely and honestly. Say the three magic words often and not merely out of habit.
#8 Show Public Affection
Regardless of your age, do not shy away from a public display of affection. Happy couples have nothing to hide and should openly show affection for each other. Being intimate will keep you connected with your partner.
A strong connection creates a happy union so give each other lots of attention. Hold each other’s hands or snuggle at your kid’s football game. Simply touching your partner can increase the sense of physical, emotional, and intellectual connection.
Do you need help with your relationship? Make an appointment with us for couples therapy in San Diego.
#9 Go to Bed at the Same Time
Avoid spending too much time doing chores or folding laundry late at night. Having a nightly routine enables you to end the day with each other. Couples do not have to fall asleep simultaneously but should wind down and get into bed together.
Before you turn in for the night, you can talk about the day ahead or get intimate. Many successful couples practice these habits before sleeping.
#10 Cook Your Meals Together
Why not have fun in the kitchen by cooking together? Cooking with your partner creates intimacy and love. It’s a wonderful way to spend quality time together.
Even if you or your partner like to cook, make it a habit to let the other person clean. Always remember to appreciate and value your partner. Let your partner know how much you love their cooking, and make it a daily ritual.
#11 Divide Household Chores
Healthy couples prioritize doing chores together. In most households, the burden of chores falls on the person who is home more often. People often repeat what they observed growing up, so living with someone from a different background can cause conflict.
Feeling like your partner’s housekeeper can create a great deal of resentment. That’s why couples must have a clear understanding of household responsibilities. Division of labor can keep the relationship intact and generate admiration for each other.
Play to your strengths and find the right balance. If one of you hates making the bed, the other may prefer doing dishes. Together, you can build trust and closeness by sharing chores.
#12 Embrace Your Similarities and Differences
When you and your partner start dating, you may have many things in common. As time passes, you may realize that you no longer share the same interests. It’s unrealistic to expect your partner to have the same hobbies and share the same opinions as you do.
Sometimes people pay too much attention to compatibility. Couples who attempt to change each other or change themselves to fit someone else’s ideals often end up broken-hearted. In happy relationships, both partners should feel comfortable expressing themselves.
Being different doesn’t mean the relationship cannot last. Accept your partner’s opinions and behaviors to make your relationship work. Respond to them with curiosity and celebrate your differences to grow closer to each other.
San Diego Couples Therapy
An effective partnership requires mutual respect, consideration, and trust. Couple Connection San Diego therapists can help uncover and resolve the conflict between two people. We have years of experience and extensive education in marriage counseling.
In addition to improving your communication skills, this type of relationship therapy can make your romantic relationships blossom. Besides mapping your thoughts and behaviors, we can help you access emotions holding you back. We provide therapy in a safe and confidential environment.